Wednesday, May 21, 2008

A Bad Moment

Today was difficult for me emotionally. In fact, I couldn’t really function this morning at work. I thought about my father and allowed myself to experience the pains/emotions of grief. Even on this blog I don’t talk about him too much. It’s been almost 2 years and I still can’t get over the fact that he’s out of my life. While there is no right or wrong way to deal with grief, I’ve chosen to ignore and block the pain. I hardly mention this topic to anyone especially new people I meet. What am I to say? Hi my name is Ms. Confessions and my father is dead.

I suppose it’s the timing of the year that’s forcing me to think about him more lately. Father’s Day is coming up. Not to mention the Lakers are doing well this season. My father was a die-hard Lakers fan. I know he would be so proud of his team. There are a few people I am comfortable talking to about my father and what I find most interesting is I may feel sad my father is gone, but there are so many people who never had a relationship with their father (let alone a loving one).

I miss him so much, there are no words. It’s still so surreal for me. I suppose I am afraid to think or talk about my father’s death because that would mean I am acknowledging reality…

6 comments:

T.C. said...

hugs to you...may you feel what you need to feel in your own time....

Blu Jewel said...

*hugs* I now realize the impact my post about my dad had on you. May God bless and keep you and also may his memory live long and strong with you.

Love!

The Love Collective said...

It's difficult. We Heart you at Boughettonews, and keep the posts coming. One love.

The Pussy Cat Bitch said...

I'm sorry your hurt, wish you were in a more blissful mood. I hope you find closure one day. Hugs. Feel better chica. :)

Ms. Confessions said...

Thanks for the love you guys!

Its a hard topic for me talk about, but I know he's watching over me :) I am so blessed to be loved by him.

Ms. Confessions said...

Thanks for the love you guys!

Its a hard topic for me talk about, but I know he's watching over me :) I am so blessed to be loved by him.

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