This past weekend my good friend was in town for a family reunion. I hooked up with her Saturday night at the hotel her family had their events at. Her other best friend came in town from Houston (a male friend) as well. We all indirectly grew up together. He was her friend from back in the day and we hung out a few times together, but not a lot.
I arrived at the hotel and my friend, her friend, and myself immediately fell into old times and enjoyed our conversations as grown ups. Her male friend in the past few years as done pretty well for himself. He moved to Houston after graduating from Prairie View and began a career in the mortgage industry. He started his own business and moved into a large home in the suburbs off a golf course. So naturally, he’s a catch in our society. You don’t find too many young successful black men.
Anyway, at the event I saw my friend’s mom. I noticed her a few times that night. Also noticed she didn’t initiate any contact with me (which is fine, at the time I thought she was busy mingling). So I went over to her, gave her a hug, and said a line or two and went back over to my friend.
I met my friend in junior high school. I recall her parents were pretty cool for the most part. Her mom was very active in church. I always felt her mom wasn’t so warm and fuzzy with me not like how my parents were to my friend. I was never comfortable coming over their house and making myself at home, let alone going over there when my friend wasn’t home. Her mom had this unjustifiable and unfair impression of me. She thought I was a “bad” influence on her daughter. To this day, I don’t understand how she came to this assumption.
Growing up my parents were pretty lax. I was a little spoiled. However, I was never an unruly child. I didn’t do any activities that were self destructive, and no one else’s parents shared her mother’s opinion. I recall once we graduated from high school. My friend casually mentioned her mother and older sister thought I was going to end up pregnant by the time I was 16. Now what kind of shit is that? Of course they could never be more wrong. I’ve never been pregnant. Ironically, it was her older sister who ended up pregnant out of wedlock.
Back to the story:
On Sunday we went to my friend’s parent’s house for the day. It was during this time I noticed Mommy Dearest had manage to have numerous conversation with the male friend but said pretty much nothing to me. Mind you, I haven’t seen her since my father’s funeral you may want to ask how me and my family are doing (or maybe not). It was also at this point when I began to feel uncomfortable being in the house. I didn’t drive, so leaving wasn’t too easy. Her father was very warm and receptive to, but mom was just distant for whatever reason.
In hindsight, I believe Mommy Dearest is a little salty towards me because I’ve turned out to be the complete opposite of what she assumed I’d be. Now you may assume that most childhood friend’s parents would not only want the best for their kids but their kid’s friends as well (so would I). I am a college graduate, I have a good career in my preferred industry, home owner, constantly pursuing new endeavors to conquer, and living a positive and productive life-child free. Her daughter on the other hand, just graduate grad school at USC and is now trying to find her way in life. I think Mommy Dearest is salty because I had a jump start on life before her daughter. I didn’t know there was a race to success.
To be honest, I can’t even recall a time when her mom has told me congratulations, definitely not recently about anything I’ve accomplished. I know this may seem strange or you may think I’m reading too deep. But what other explanation is there for her behavior. You can’t tell me she was too busy playing hostess. Especially since I was able to compare and contrast in person the interaction between me and mom versus male friend and mom.
I honestly believe Mommy Dearest wants her daughter to end up with the male friend. I refuse to believe she was all up in this man’s face, with no ulterior motives. She hasn’t seen me in about the same time frame as male friend. The only problem is male friend has a live in girlfriend.
I don’t see a point in having this conversation with my friend. How do you mention all of this without her being insulted or taking offense? At any rate, I’ll continue to do me. And I want nothing but the best for my friend. There’s more than enough room at the top.