Sunday, May 06, 2007
True Lies..Episode 1
Looking back I ask myself why was this person/experience a part of my life? But I must remember that with every experience lies a lesson waiting to be learned.
This past week I had a pretty bad email exchange with my “friend” the guy with the girlfriend who feels threaten by our relationship. During the course of our relating as unconventional as it may have been or even started; I thought somehow we could transcend smoothly into a decent friendship. But of course I was wrong.
Part of my closure and the beauty of having this blog is for me to release any and all feelings that I feel are toxic or even positive. I am pleased to know that the wound this person tried to inflict on me recently doesn’t sting or burn as much to me these days. Perhaps its because I’ve moved past this relationship emotionally.
I love my friend as a person and I wish him well. But I suppose I've outgrown the adventures this relationship entailed. They say THERE'S NO REAL HONOR AMOUNG THIEVES. This statement could never be more true. My friend tried to challenge my morals, character, word, and honor. Yet, you don’t honor your word or loyalty to the one person where you would think it would matter most- YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
Loyalty= the state or quality of being loyal; faithfulness to commitments or obligations.
Your anger stems from my lack of loyalty towards you. Yet, I find it very ironic due to the fact that we had a relationship despite the fact that you have a girlfriend.
Trust= reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
I trusted you to be nothing more than yourself. After all we both knew each other’s situation. I trusted that regardless of what was going on outside of us-we were there for each other.
Friend= a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter.
We filled each other’s voids equally; there was no giving without receiving. We effortlessly satisfied our emotional beings- yet the entire experience was in VAIN. But I still called you a friend.
But the lines were beyond fucked up when we thought we could disregard the irresistible lust and love we had for each other and pretend to be platonic friends. But some things are better left alone. In our situation it really boiled down to ALL or NOTHING, no in between…